The Gratitude Challenge

November 30, 2018Recently, many people on my Facebook feed have been doing 30 Days of Gratitude.  From expressing gratitude for grandchildren to music to animals to nature, I have enjoyed seeing what my friends are grateful for.It is easy to get out of the habit of being grateful. There is much that is lacking in our various worlds. It might be as "small" as driving on the Beltway and being passed by a very swift-moving motorcycle rider who startled you as he swerved around you and passed--then you look down and realize he had to be going 80 mph or so, as quickly as he disappeared in front of you. Okay, so maybe that seemed small, but had he wrecked? Not so small a thing.Or there's that car driving along the Beltway (sorry, I've had to go into DC three times in as many nights this week!) at dusk WITH NO HEADLIGHTS ON.  This results in my grumbling and growling, not gratitude. (P.S. Don't be like this driver. Keep your headlights on all the time, then you never have to worry!)Then there are the typical days that we all have--those days when it seems that we're getting nibbled to death by ducks and interruptions.Yet I hope that as we all speed along in this holiday season, we will remember to slow down. To think, with some intention, about the things and people for whom we are grateful.One discipline that I followed for a while--and yes, it was very helpful--was to get my journal every night and write down at least THREE things for which I was grateful that night. What positive thing had happened that day--even if it was a glimmer of good within a challenging situation?  What kindness had someone done for me--even if they did that unintentionally? How had a family member of close friend shown love to me?We are just past the holiday of Thanksgiving, and we now look ahead to Christmas and the New Year. The new liturgical year will begin this Sunday with Advent I. On Sunday, Laura McGuire will share with us about what that means and what a new Church year looks like.We at St. Philip's have had our official Ingathering Sunday, when we blessed the pledges received so far, pledges that will enable our Finance Committee and Vestry to plan a budget for 2019. Of course that isn't the "end" of pledge season. It is on-going, and we are not yet at our goal, as you can see below.Yet there is much for which your rector is grateful, and I would like to express a few things.

1. In a post-Christian culture, it is easy to get distracted and occupied by many things other than coming to worship on Sunday. So when I sit up front in the altar area and look out, I find myself grateful for the faces I see consistently, week after week. I know that showing up is 95% of life, and I know that the Christian community is so much more than the sum of its parts. Together, we support, nurture, challenge and love each other. Together, we grow faster in our spiritual lives than we do alone. So when you make a commitment to come to worship regularly, we are all blessed, and I, as one of your clergy leaders, am grateful.

2.  Several key leaders have passed the baton of leadership roles on to other folks. I am grateful, on two counts. One is that I am grateful for people who have led ministries for many years and thus have strengthened events like Thanksgiving Dinner or Winter Shelter or Chili Cook-off (which funds Thanksgiving Dinner.) Because of good, strong, dependable leaders, these ministries have grown and thrived.

However, I am also grateful when folks realize that other people have gifts to offer as well. In their passing the baton, then moving on to other ministries, they allow others to learn how to lead, and to do good ministry as well. Years ago, I sang in a church choir, and at a certain time of the year, I had been singing a particular solo every year. One year, I made the decision to say "no" to that offer to sing. I feared no one would step up. But someone else did step up. And she would never have done that had I held onto that solo chance with a tight death grip. That woman had a chance to use her gifts, but in order for her to do that, I had to be willing to step aside and give her space to do that. And guess what? The music program didn't fall apart at the seams. A good lesson on several fronts, including a spiritual lesson for me.

3.  I am grateful for a parish that is vibrant, healthy, and outward-facing. One sign of a dying faith community is that its people get more and more inward-focused. I don't think St. Philip's is too inward-focused. We do have work to do. Because a living organism cannot stay the same--it is either dying or it is growing--we have some intentional work to do in the next year. I believe that it is time to put some concrete steps in place for growth and leadership development, and so Vestry and other leaders will be involved with those conversations in 2019. However, I hear other clergy in this and other dioceses moan about conflict and passive-aggressive behavior in their local faith communities, I give God silent thanks for you all. We do not all agree all the time about what to do or how to do it. Yet for the most part, we talk TO each other and not ABOUT each other. Healthy Christian community is like a good marriage. It takes hard work. Thankfully, I think we work hard at making this community a healthy one.

So today, those are three specific things for which I am grateful. I challenge you to join me in getting a piece of paper out, or a notebook, or a journal, and from today through the end of 2018, to list at least THREE things or people for whom you are grateful. Do this every morning, or every night before you go to bed. Draw pictures. Use colorful pens. Make this a fun thing.See if thinking about, then writing down, three gratitudes, changes your perspective in any way. See if it makes any difference in your day. For example, if you end up waiting in a long line in the grocery store, or in a department store, or in the Post Office as you mail Christmas gifts, how might you make those encounters part of what you list that night? If you do nothing else, you could try praying silently for each person you see in that line. They'll never know, but you can bet each one has some heaviness in their hearts about something, or some joy that makes them smile. Every person has a story. You may never know that story, but you can bet they have one. Bless them silently. Pray that God will send them the gifts they need, at the moment they need them. Pray that God will give them strength or courage or healing.You may well find that your own heart is made more sensitive and more thankful. Try it. Let me know how it goes. With gratitude for YOU. Sheila+